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Thread: thinking out loud
10-14-2014, 03:54 PM #1
thinking out loud
well, i recently tried to kill myself, but it didnt work because the cord wasnt tight enough and it slowly slipped through. so i just woke up out of a nap.
my brother is scheduled for some intense surgery and his chances of survival are minimal
i visited my parents not too long ago and i over heard a complete conversation that basically sums up that my father is suicidal.
ive also failed my second exam which means my life is fucked because it's that one class that controls everything.
whatever, better luck next time right?
10-14-2014, 04:14 PM #2
Living Liek Larry
- Join Date
- May 2011
- Listen, strange women lyin' in ponds distributin' swords is no basis for a system of government.
Hey man if you want to talk about shit im here, i have SATs tommorow so im currently studying but i get home 2ish tommorow. If you want i can send yah my number or skype
i have been there, and its not fun.
10-14-2014, 04:15 PM #3
Well, life will certainly kick you down but you gotta be strong enough to keep getting back up. You've made it this far, no? I think you can be strong enough to make it through another trial in life. Everyone has their own shit to deal with right?
10-14-2014, 05:07 PM #4
Tried to kill yourself? Man what kind of cop out pussy shit is that? Dude you are way better than that.
When life pushes push back. An exam that controls everything? Nope no such exam exists. There are always re takes and next years. Look beyond tomorrow, when the pimp hand of life smacks you down get up and run it over with a bulldozer. Quit feeling bad for yourself and change it. It's time to rise up, man up and battle.....(lol ffdp song)
Your brother may not get to live his life so you should end yours? Man, you should live for your brother. Live for all those that can no longer. Live like there's no tomorrow not die cause you don't want tomorrow.
Nothing in life is worth killing yourself over.
Push back buddy, I'd sure miss ya.
10-14-2014, 07:16 PM #5
There are people way shittier off than you are. Suicide may be an easy way out of it all but if everything turns out ok and for the better, you'll never know. I've been rock bottom like this before too but I waited everything out and things got better. Though some things can't be healed, the pain can be relieved.
Don't want to see anything like this happen to anyone else I know. Good luck to you and whatever's going on to make you like this, dude.
10-14-2014, 08:25 PM #6
Come to Washington and lets just be awesome and whatnot. Fuck what's going on, party every day!
Just have to squeeze some work in between, but whateves.
10-14-2014, 09:28 PM #7
Thank you Fatal for not sugar coating it.
Even if you don't have it in you to say "fuck this, I'm not gonna let this get the best of me." You sort of have to, life won't stop running for you.
I mean the whole point of life is to live, weather you hit obstacles or not, if you're just going to kill yourself then that sort of takes the purpose out of it.
I've come to learn that depressive periods are just a normal part of life, some hit some earlier than others or later, but if you put it in your head that it's just a regular thing, then doesn't it seem even more silly to kill yourself?
Especially since your brother is in the position he is, I'm sure he wouldn't like to know that death wasn't inevitably in your near future but you still chose it to be, completely ignorant to the outweighing benefits and pleasures that await you, when he doesn't even have life as a choice. If he skips surgery, possible deadly complications may surface, but if he has the surgery done, he will still face deadly complications.
You see where I'm going with this right? Even if he makes it out alright, he doesn't have another choice that will ensure his survival, but you do, I think he'd like you to choose life.
Another thing too, if you kill yourself, who is gonna help your father? I mean sure your mother could help, but to put all that weight on her, it takes a family sometimes. Who knows maybe helping him in the process may help yourself as well.
and like Fatal said concerning the exam, there isn't such a thing. Especially if you care about it as much as you seem to, there will always be another option for the hard working and determined.
But hey, we all need a point in the right direction sometimes.
One thing that helped me look for methods to recovering from chronic depression was to keep in mind the three outlets,
there is physical, mental, and spiritual.
Physical of course like working out, yoga, etc.
Mental would be maybe a change in morals, switching perspectives, you know just deep-thinking exercises in general. Mental could also be expression, through art (which I see you do already), music, literature, etc.
and Spiritual, of course, exploring other religions or maybe leaving your current whatever you may be.
I'm sure you knew this but it helps to keep it in mind, I guess it helps simplify the complications that method finding can bring.
Despite having said all that, there is one thing that I feel is required for almost everybody, and that is getting out of the house more. if you don't already. It may seem safer and more secure to stay inside because you can just curl up, listen to your music in peace, eat some food, and sulk.
But when you are in such emergency state of emotional and mental being, you need to force yourself eventually to make sacrifices for the better.
You don't have to go out for a walk or a jog if that isn't your thing, just get out. Drive to a cafe if you have to, or a library
With all that out of the way, I hope things go well man, please try to remember there is an after, and there will be a new day,
10-15-2014, 02:42 AM #8
10-15-2014, 04:08 AM #9
10-15-2014, 04:36 AM #10
Gunna be real, cus this shit's real.
Killing yourself is appealing as fuck 50% of the time, for 20% of your life. Going to refer to a Snoop Dogg song, which I'll look like a cunt for doing but I hate most of you as it is so dgaf.
The entire video is about smoking weed and shit, sure. But if you ever hear him explain it, it applies to everything.
So what, you're different.
So what you're having issues with school.
So what you're facing some mountains that you haven't quite yet found out how to bound.
It also says that worrying about the future too much can put you in a haze. Always try to find what can make you happy in the immediate future. Suicide may sound like the easy option there, but in reality, are you really that determined to ruin what could be(and what I think will be) a fruitful life?
I got you man, if you need shit, I'm a pm away.